She isn't the one that is going to have to get those pesky rings from hell off (though I'm sure there's some crafty solution on Pinterest) or be told by her husband that me and my friends are the reason we can't have nice things. No way. That's all me.
Well, I've come up with a solution. A super awesome and passive aggressive solution.
Let your coasters do all the talking!!
Actually, I can't take all the credit for these. My friend Cayse has coasters with these sayings that she originally bought from Urban Outfitters about a million years ago. The only link I could find is this one. They are paper doily coasters and to make them more durable, she reinforced them onto pieces of cork and sprayed them with sealer.
I thought they were perfect, and my husband thought they were funny, albeit tacky. Even better.
I vowed that night (as she handed me "no one likes a hot mess" and I pondered the significance) that these would soon grace my coffee table.
Fast-forward like 3 months, because that's just how I do things. Ridiculously slow.
I opened up Publisher, found some fonts I love and got to work. I left out "be considerate, bitches" only because I only had 4 tiles to work with. I'll probably add that one eventually. (read: most likely in 3 more months)
I then decided they needed some pretty scrapbook paper, because what made the original coasters so amazing was that they were doilies. Like, how more prim and proper can you get than doilies?? So I chose this bright floral paper that just screamed girly. I attached some washi tape to two of the coasters, but didn't like how it looked with the other two, so I nixed it. That's the best part of these, they are rough. The ink on one smeared when I put on the first coat of mod podge. I didn't want them to be perfect. I'm literally calling you an asshole and a douchebag and implying you have worse manners than a skank. LITERALLY.
So yeah, then I just mod podged the hell out of them. I think I used 3 coats, but they definitely should be sealed as well. Maybe when I make the other coaster. In like, 3 months. ;)
In keeping with my inappropriate, child-unfriendly craft day, I also made this canvas that has found a home in my craft room. It's just wrapping paper hot glued to canvas with black glitter stickers. I was going to paint the whole canvas and take the stickers off, but decided I loved it too much to mess it up.
And it's a great message. Don't be mediocre.
DO EPIC SHIT!
